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Singer Brandi Carlile talks about retreating from the version of herself on stage

JUANA SUMMERS, HOST:

Every week, a guest draws a card from NPR's Wild Card deck and answers a big question about their life. Brandi Carlile says that in order to write her new album, she had to retreat from the version of herself on stage.

(SOUNDBITE OF ARCHIVED NPR CONTENT)

BRANDI CARLILE: I love to entertain. I sang background vocals for an Elvis impersonator from the time I was, like, a teenager. And I love Elvis Presley. And I love, like, the great entertainers whose - they have a grandiosity about them and a sparkliness (ph), but there's also a selflessness in setting self aside to entertain.

SUMMERS: The new album is "Returning To Myself." Carlile spoke with Wild Card host Rachel Martin.

(SOUNDBITE OF ARCHIVED NPR CONTENT)

RACHEL MARTIN: What have you found surprising about getting older?

CARLILE: What I found surprising about getting older is that I really like it. I like the way it feels in my heart and mind. I like the way I look. I like the way my face looks. I don't think I loved being young or having that kind of chaos meteor tail behind me, you know? And I got a lot of older friends. And so I can see the end of the road. I know what it looks like.

MARTIN: And that doesn't wig you out? That doesn't intimidate you?

CARLILE: I mean, I'm terrified of, like, death, and I'm not a big mortality Zen person. But I do like it. I do like being - getting older.

MARTIN: Yeah.

CARLILE: A lot. Do you?

MARTIN: I feel ambivalent about it.

CARLILE: Do you?

MARTIN: I'm a little older than you are, Brandi Carlile. And things start to happen to a woman's body.

CARLILE: (Laughter).

MARTIN: And there are parts of the aging process that really suck.

CARLILE: Yeah.

MARTIN: But...

CARLILE: I mean, I do hurt.

MARTIN: I mean...

CARLILE: The aches and pains...

MARTIN: ...It's weird...

CARLILE: ...That's a bummer.

MARTIN: ...Joint pains.

CARLILE: That's a bummer. I know what you mean.

MARTIN: I'm like, super scratchy on my back all of a sudden.

CARLILE: Scratchy on your back (laughter)?

MARTIN: Yeah. I don't know. There's all kinds of weird symptoms with menopause. I digress. But I do like being in a place where I don't care so much.

CARLILE: Yeah. That's the best.

MARTIN: It's really a freeing thing, you know? I want to wear weird clothes to my kids' baseball games.

CARLILE: Dude, same.

MARTIN: (Laughter).

CARLILE: All that is better than not being sore, honestly.

MARTIN: Yeah.

CARLILE: Like, I don't like...

MARTIN: It is. It outweighs, like...

CARLILE: Yeah.

MARTIN: ...The downsides of the aging right now for me too. I guess. You talked me into it.

CARLILE: Yeah. Just embrace the heating pad.

MARTIN: Yeah. Yeah. I mean, I do. I have three heating pads now. Three.

CARLILE: Oh, my God. You know, I'm not trying to name drop, but my friendship with Annie Lennox consists of us sending each other pictures of our heating pads...

MARTIN: (Laughter).

CARLILE: ...In our bed before we go to sleep in random hotel rooms.

(LAUGHTER)

CARLILE: And when I met Alanis Morissette...

MARTIN: That's my favorite thing.

CARLILE: ...In May, she's sent me three heating pads since I met her. She's got, like, all of these heating pads that she recommends.

MARTIN: Come on.

CARLILE: Yeah, that girl is all about, like, taking care of yourself.

MARTIN: Yes.

CARLILE: Yeah.

MARTIN: And the heating pad is a magical, magical thing that more people should understand and use on a regular basis.

CARLILE: Underrated, and they can go anywhere - commercial flights.

MARTIN: Totally.

CARLILE: I mean, people look at you funny. Just take them out, plug them in and just be comfortable.

MARTIN: That is a great idea.

CARLILE: I know.

MARTIN: It may be the most important thing I've learned today.

CARLILE: Yeah.

MARTIN: (Laughter).

SUMMERS: You can watch a longer conversation with Brandi Carlile by searching for @nprwildcard on YouTube. Her new album, "Returning To Myself," is out now.

(SOUNDBITE OF MUSIC) Transcript provided by NPR, Copyright NPR.

NPR transcripts are created on a rush deadline by an NPR contractor. This text may not be in its final form and may be updated or revised in the future. Accuracy and availability may vary. The authoritative record of NPR’s programming is the audio record.